Which What Where? Pulling at Threads...

Even though I have been easing myself back into the realm of the Pagan community for a couple of years now, I still have a bit of Rip Van Winkle particles clinging to me.  Several long road trips and extended time in the studio have allowed for dedicated listening to a variety of podcasts, varying from specific practices to general commentary on the community.

And I must say, I find it rather fascinating to see what's being argued about these days.

Twenty years ago, one of the biggest pressing issues was interfaith working and religious rights - getting the variety of paths under the Pagan umbrella recognized for being valid, fighting discrimination, and working to educate others.  This was the time of the founding/organization of Pagan Pride (in a more formalized way, or attempt at), the Pagan Leaders Summit, working to get Pagan recognition within the armed services, schools, press, prisons, etc.  I was in the thick of it, hosting the first Rhode Island PPD, being an associate editor of Crescent Magazine, founding a college Pagan Society (that grew beyond that quickly), creating public events, lecturing at colleges about Paganism, among other things (makes me tired just thinking about it!). For the most part, looking back, there has been much success in accomplishing many of these goals thanks to many minds, hearts, and hands. That's rather amazing!

Within the community, the arguing (ahem, issues) back then seemed fairly split between tradition authenticity/validity and Wicca vs. Witchcraft/witchcraft.  I have to say, in my 20's, I got rather tired of explaining that no, I wasn't Wiccan, though we had plenty of folks in the open path group that were.

I'm glad to see that for the most part, nowadays there's recognition and respect in the validity of one's path, regardless of its supposed age. The discontent seems to have shifted more to "are you doing it right?" - and "it" being akin to describing an invisible elephant floating in the middle of a black hole.

Stepping back, it looks to be largely all about semantics: What and how are you labeling yourself? What does that label mean to you, me - in Indiana or in Italy or in India? Are there gods? What are they? Are you worshiping them correctly per your method of understanding them? Is it spirituality, religion, or practice? Is it a vocation or state of being? What is your purpose? What is your responsibility? What do these words mean and who used them first, last, or is there something better?

I think it speaks highly of the efforts of twenty years ago, that instead of our primary worry being about our rights to practice whatever we do - without immediate danger of losing jobs, homes, family, lives (though not true for everywhere, even in parts of the US), we're neck-deep in exploring the academic and esoteric - examining the threads that make up the tapestry versus worrying if there's a place we can safely hang the tapestry in the first place.  That's also pretty amazing.

The tricky thing is to be able to not get bogged down in creating more marginal within the marginal.  Whether you see your path as a religion, a spirituality, a vocation, or some other sort of practice - it's precisely and primarily YOUR path.  Your relationship to the world - be it the plants, trees, animals, gods, electrons, or donuts - is specific and unique to you. There are surely similarly among paths and even within traditions, but your connection to it all is still unique and different on the level of the thread in the larger tapestry.  Regardless of what you call it.

Labels help us identify and describe - and words have meaning and power  - but that meaning can change - from place to place, person to person, time to time.  So we need to reach beyond the words and find the similarities and seek to understand differences.  We can talk about what we do (if we choose to do that at all), without degrading or dismissing other paths.  We can compare and contrast without condemning. We can share our beliefs and describe our journeys while simultaneously not invalidating the experiences of others.  We can listen to why others choose the words they do, and learn more about ourselves in the process.  If we wish to talk about why something is wrong, we need to be willing to talk about how to do it right.

Walking your own path doesn't mean trampling over others.  Sometimes we overlap, sometimes we run parallel, and sometimes we meet at the crossroads.

Above and below all things, be armed with respect as you encounter others - and we'll be amazed when we look back in another 20 years.

PantheaCon Ramble 2016!

The Owlkeyme Arts Booth at PantheaCon, 2016

I need a mini-PantheaCon to come down from PantheaCon. (I refuse to say the return to reality was harsh, because it's all reality...I just want a bit more P-Con time.)

The Prep:
Last year the band toured after P-Con, this year we toured before, which meant a LOT more planning on my part to get everything done for the booth before we started on the road. Somehow I succeeded in accomplishing most of what I wanted to get done. We did end up having to take two cars down to the Bay Area to fit everything for booth and band (yes, there's a mini-van in our future), but the upside of that was 14 hours of listening to podcasts on my own. (My favorite podcast out of the bunch I listened to was Down at the Crossroads - I made the band listen to at least 4 of them with me again when we got it down to one car).  I may have yelled aloud at a few points (to no one in particular, though the Oregon countryside may have taken offense), but mainly it made for a strong inspirational brew of thoughts, images, and music (to come!) - and a fairly good frame of mind heading into the tour.

The tour itself went very well - much more smoothly than last year on several levels, with full shows, less traffic, and great vibes.  The following week landed us at Anaar's, where we caught up, brainstormed, prepared for our workshop, and helped each other get ready for PantheaCon.

P-Con! 
Friday morning, I was fairly well-rested, packed, and ahead of schedule. Then I turned the key in Tiny Blue Car and a wealth of dummy lights were ablaze - that made no sense to be on while the car was in park, so my gut said electrical blurp (and was proven right).  Perhaps the universe thought I needed to be stressed about something, since everything else was going well!

2015 was the first year I'd returned to having a booth at P-Con - which was largely successful in huge ways, but the set-up had nearly brought me to a nervous breakdown.  This year I was determined to have a smooth set-up, and made some key adjustments, resulting in a MUCH better set-up experience. With the booth set up at a decent pace without stress, I got to enjoy the rest of the morning and afternoon seeing the hotel swell with P-Con attendees, seeing old and new friends alike.  I had hoped to make some of the programming, but with two bandmates in various states of plaguedom, I was content to connect with folks at the booth.

As we rolled into evening, shut the booth down, got a decent meal, then got ready to present "Possessing The Dark: Choreolalia - Speaking In Dance" with Anaar.  It had been 10 years since we last offered this workshop together, so we had taken some time to update and revise it to get the best flow for our audience. We still did some adjusting in the moment to account for the room, the number of attendees (a LOT!), and the overall flow of the workshop. Overall, very satisfied with how it went, and it's always a pleasure to work with Anaar. We're plotting more things together.

Being already on a tour schedule (I switch to about 6 hours of sleep instead of 8), and paranoid about being late, got up and moving fairly early on Saturday.  Managed to do a real breakfast, get the booth set up for the day, and off to my "Power of Line & Symbol: The Art of Sigil Magick" presentation rather early to find the room already quite full. At first I thought the previous event hadn't ended yet, but nope...all these folks were waiting for me.  And despite having taught how many dance workshops and metaphysical classes over the years, I was feeling a bit nervous. Once the tech was ready, and we moved some tables to make some more room, I announced to the class that if anyone was hoping for traditional, ceremonial magic-style sigil work, now's the time to leave, because that's not what we were going to talk about. Not a single person budged.

And off we went.  The culmination of the class was working together to design a sigil for PantheaCon - the theme for this year being "Making Changes." Folks called out intentions we could focus on to help make it a great con experience - and keep going from there out into the larger community.  Then we used the basic design vocabulary I had introduced to design the image you see on the right.

The response to the sigil workshop was truly overwhelming and wonderful - and I found out they sadly had to turn a lot of folks away, and I was asked to offer it again next year.

And after that, the rest of the day was swallowed by the booth, which was hopping for the rest of the time we were open!

And somewhere my brain thought I had the evening off (it desperately wanted that), but nope, I had been invited to perform in the Hero's Journey Through Bellydance Show at 9pm. No time to eat, so off to get into costume and head over the ballrooms.  The show managed to score a larger room this year, which was great, and there was a lot of thought put into all of the very diverse performances.  Alas, there was a serious sound tech issue that swallowed a fair bit of the music, but the performers made it work and I think for the most part, the audience didn't know as it was happening. (My piece turned into an instrumental...which was hilarious, because I had been performing to the song live all week on tour, and was on stage wondering if the recorded version had a much longer intro...).

I don't quite remember Sunday morning, but much of that day was involved with band business: arriving and coordinating band members, loading in equipment for the Mythpunk Concert, and me alone at the booth. Had to close the booth down earlier because the concert started at 7, and I needed to get into costume again. This year the show didn't conflict with the bellydance show, but holy moses, the Feri Revival was next door, and that was a huge crowd of folks waiting to get in!  Still, parts I (us) and II (Pandemonaeon) were well attended and folks had a great time.

Monday morning came pretty hard, as did some variety of plague, but it was a lovely morning and afternoon of saying goodbyes.

I did get to spend some time in the hospitality rooms throughout the weekend (in the evenings) - mainly Black Rose (shout out to Devin and Storm) and Hexenfest suites, and a quick run-by the Llewellyn suite for the meet-and-greet/social as a soon-to-be-published author of one of their titles. I especially enjoy Black Rose because of the mood and interesting folks to talk to - generally without the awkwardness of being hit on.  (Though I'm rather oblivious about that anyway...)

Overall, I am really humbled and amazed by the reactions to my art and to my presentations.  Many large originals (and many more prints/jewelry/coloring books/etc) went to new homes, and I accepted a few commissions as well. I felt like it was a huge affirmation that I'm on the right path with all of my work.

I really enjoyed the vibe of the whole convention this year - it felt really positive and wonderful.  I had great interactions with staff, volunteers, and met so many folks. I'm lamenting though that I didn't get to spend as much time with certain folks as I hoped, nor did I really get to attend any other presentations.  I'm already eyeing the schedule for Paganicon in March and feeling like it's going to go the same way.  I really need to see what I can do to get more personal time in my schedule, and make sure I get to attend more things. Probably will be a combination of limiting myself to giving only 2 presentations, and making sure I have (healthy) booth help.

Call Out for Cauldrons!

As you may or may not know, I am in the midst of writing "The Witch's Cauldron" which will be published in 2017 by Llewellyn.  This book will be part of the series that started with Deborah Blake's "The Witch's Broom" and the recently released  Jason Mankey's "The Witch's Athame" - and others to come as well. Each of these books include tidbits from other practitioners (besides the authors) sharing their thoughts and practices on the subject matter.

If the cauldron is integral to your practice, and you have some favorite lore or commentary you'd like to share for publication, please send your writing via email to owlkeyme.arts(at)gmail(dot)com by January 24th.

Thanks so much!

Crossroad Vision - Or - We're All Naked At The End

About this time 6 years ago, I was interviewing for what would be my last big corporate job. I was asked what I would call my best and worst attributes. My answer was the same thing for both - that I am rather even keel in personality and approach. Meaning, that I am extremely calm and level-headed in the face of utter chaos, which is highly desirable for designers who are often faced with needing to pull a miracle out of a hat with a deadline of yesterday and no resources. It really takes a lot for me to rage-flip the cosmic tables. Inversely, when good things happen, I tend to take it all in stride, which I have discovered can be maddening (to others) in a corporate environment where much enthusiasm is faked.   (Really, to get me to appear super-excited, there needs to be a combination of sleep deprivation, booze, cake, and either bunnies or kittens, preferably both.)

And more than half a decade later, I have discovered that I continue to expand and deepen this approach in relation to most things, tempered with experience and soaked in memory.  I find it hard to get riled up over whatever is "the worst thing ever to happen to" (dance, Paganism, art, you name it) that week. Nor am I quick to embrace "the best thing ever to happen to's" either.  At this point I can look back at over 20 years on the Pagan Path (and coming on 17 years in dance) and note multiple examples of best and worst things ever that have come and gone.  But more importantly, I can see how change has had a role in growth, acceptance, diversity, representation, and community structure. I can reflect on remember the stories my mentors and elders have shared with me from the years before, can see the changes in my cohorts and contemporaries, and watch the next generation blossom and shift in the winds.

I call this vantage point "Crossroad Vision."  You are able to see where you are coming from, what's happening now, and you get a glimpse of the future. And the calmer you are, the farther out you can see. Though it can be rather frustrating to have this multifaceted grounded view of time while others are flipping their respective shit in the hot moment (for both sides of the equation).  One can get lost in despair about change not happening (at all or fast enough). But Change, it can be a slow, sneaky motherfucker. It rarely happens under your direct watch, and much more quietly and smoothly then you might think.

So I wanted to share this little metaphor about how ideas appear and cause change over time.

Let's say you are going to a week-long outdoor spiritual festival in the woods. It's clothing optional and you're camping. You practice the metaphorical interpretation of "ye shall be naked in your rites" versus the literal view, so being naked in front of other people is so NOT your thing.

Day 1: You arrive late in the afternoon and drive as directed to your camp site...turn the corner and get a full view of someone's naked butt. AH! Overt! Overt! You try and focus on the road and spend quite a bit of time getting your camping set-up just right before it gets too dark.

Day 2: You wake up finish setting up the grounds, and decide to go on a walk...and OH MY there are more naked people.  WHERE DO THEY PUT STUFF? THAT'S A LOT OF SUNSCREEN...WHAT ABOUT BUGS?

Day 3: As you settle into a workshop circle, you note there are 3 naked people. Yeap, them people be nekkid. That's a thing.

Day 4: You find yourself changing in your tent with the flap open.  It's too hot anyway.

Day 5: You're changing outside of the tent. Who cares? Easier than inside anyway.

Day 6: You're removing layers at the drum circle, mostly everyone seems to be missing a fair bit of attire anyway.  Safety and all that, you know.

Day 7: You don't even see any difference between naked and attired folks. No big deal. And now you're thinking about next year how much less stuff you would have to pack if you didn't wear clothes every day.

Yes, it's a fun (and um, somewhat true) story, but consider the gradual change in mind and relative personal comfort about nudity as a metaphor for any really any new idea taking root.  It may not happen in a week, but as people get exposed to more correct, current, and balanced ways of perceiving gender, sexuality, race, spirituality, ability, and more - they slowly and steadily begin to get used to those ideas, and learn to respect and/or embrace them. First people are made aware of the idea, then they see more of it, and begin to understand it - and it all happens at the pace of their own personal comfort and inner workings.  Some people work fast and move gracefully as they absorb, some people work slow and stagger clumsily and awkwardly into it.  But most people DO embrace change in the end.  Some people have a lot of fears and misconceptions they need to let go of first. Others may be watch quietly, and slowly absorb the changes into their psyche. There's no telling how it's going to go down.  Patience: it is definitely a thing.

So my advice to you, if you find yourself swept up into the next big "best/worst ever," take a moment to step back and position yourself on the crossroads. Take a good long look in all directions, and breathe in deep. Remember that Change is enduring, often adorned with Coyote's eyes and Fox's tail...but we're all just naked at the end.

The Voice of the Witch

"Baba Yaga" - Painting by Tempest

The way of the Witch is not an easy one - nor despite the cyclical brushes of culture limelight, a truly popular one.

To be a Witch is to be of the marginal, and for the marginal of society.  This path is often iconoclastic, drawing a route against the grain of the majority.  This truth is nothing new, it's been this way for centuries, and I would hazard to suspect longer than that, given the patterns of human nature.

The Witch exists in a space simultaneously of the community and not of the community.  Partly because the Witch deals in matters of the Other - the gods, the spirits, the dead, the mysteries, and partly because the Witch is a keeper of knowledge, an independent thinker, and essentially a loner. When you see the world differently, it changes how you interact with it.

The Witch has long been the one who knows, the one you go to when no one else will help, in the dark depths of night, in the hidden part of the woods. The Witch is the gateway to the unknown, the dangerous and the wild.

So when we speak, it should not surprise us that our words are not always welcome. When we speak up for what we believe is the right way, when we stand to fight for the marginalized and against injustice, and when we seek to talk of balance, growth, and education - it will cause discontent. The same people may call you beautiful and gifted in one breath, may condemn and strike against you in the next breath when your words make them uncomfortable. But their response can't change your path or the validity of your words and actions.

This all is nothing new. It has been our history and is very likely our future. We have been hunted, tortured, maimed, condemned, jailed, burned, and killed for our ways. But we go continue on, because we must.  You must remember that their actions and responses reflect more upon them than it does you.  It can't steal the power of your words or your path - unless you let them.

It is easy to get caught up in the glamour, the trappings, the talk of elusive mysteries and power and forget that we walk and talk a dangerous path.  Be true to what you believe, speak it, and do it.  It takes a brave soul to shine light upon the fears and expose the shadows. And in time, they will learn, if you keep going.

Travel well.

In Memory of Us

Jill Tracy & Paul Mercer at the OTO, photo by Tempest

This past Monday, in a darkened room in the Bywater neighborhood of New Orleans, an eclectic crowd gathered to participate in an unusual performance - a musical seance with musicians Jill Tracy and Paul Mercer.

Individuals were invited to bring a personal item of meaning to them or from a deceased loved one, and place it on a table.  The musicians took turns selecting objects from the table, and invited the owner to share a bit about the meaning or person behind that.  Then a musical piece was composed on the spot to honor that spirit or memory.

I didn't have an object on the table, but that didn't stop me from contemplating the deceased, memorials, and ancestor worship.

Grave Sculpture at Metairie, photo by Tempest

No matter what name you give it, this time of year throughout the world is heavily steeped in traditions regarding the deceased: All Hallow's Eve, All Saints, All Souls, Dia de los Muertos, etc. (From a larger, longer perspective, every spiritual tradition and culture has some sort of ritual, observance, or structure for remembering the dead, even if it doesn't happen at this time of the year.)

Recently, I have seen a lot of different and interesting viewpoints from the Pagan/Polytheist community on honoring and interacting with the deceased, the Mighty Dead, the Ancestors. There are those with strong beliefs on what is the proper way to honor one's ancestors, and those who feel that their ancestors would definitely NOT approve of their spiritual path and would be offended by it, or would be disconnected by the generations that have passed. I think each has a valid point, as we all experience death and cultural identity in different ways.

For me personally, I grew up in a house that had some rather unusual otherworldly activity, but never had a sense that it was connected directly to our family.  My early introduction to death was the curiosity that I only had a godmother - my father's sister, as her husband/my godfather had passed away before I was 2.  When I was 8, my paternal grandfather passed away (preceded in death by his wife 31 years earlier), and while he was included in many family gatherings at our home, I was nowhere as close to him as my maternal grandparents, who I spent a great deal of time with.  Family drama post-funeral created a wall of confusion, making me more aware of the behavior of living humans than memories of the deceased. As fate would have it, it would be another 23 years before I would encounter death again in such a close family sense when my grandfather passed away.

Stained Glass Mausoleum, photo by Tempest

While I had great aunts and uncles and great-grandparents who passed on throughout my childhood, I never got a sense that they were "watching over" me. Why would they, when they had their own families (my cousins, etc) to watch? Nor did I have any self-identified "spirit guides", unlike most of the other professional psychic readers I encountered.  I certainly encountered other people's ancestors and spirits when giving readings, but not my own in such a specific way.

But in the time surrounding my grandfather's passing (before, while in hospice, and after), I began to have vivid dreams with him, involving long conversations and specific imagery. I was reminded of the Mediterranean and Slavic traditions that hold the belief that the ancestors can still teach and guide us after they have passed on.  Whether it was our deep personal connection, or that the relationship felt more in line with what qualified for receiving guidance in my book, I understood it and felt it. I had a lifetime of wonderful memories behind it.

But I digress, let's head back to New Orleans last Monday. Earlier in the day, we visited Metairie Cemetery to look at the beautiful monuments. Two days prior to that, I was thinking of my godfather as we passed Molly's At The Market on Decatur Street - as earlier in the year I had uncovered an article he had written about it in 1979.  It happened to be the bar we had met friends at on our previous visit to NOLA.  Standing in the cemetery, I began to wonder where he was buried, so I pulled up the obituary on my phone...and discovered it was the very cemetery we were at (and there are a LOT in New Orleans).  The office helped me locate the gravesite, and it turned out to be just meters down the road from where I was standing when the thought had occurred to me.  Coincidence? Perhaps. Godfatherly connection, or that I look very much like my aunt, and close to the same age she was when he died?

So this was all weighing heavily on my mind as I watched the musical seance. I felt the room chill as Paul played a song dedicated to his friend David who had passed last Halloween. I listened to people tell their stories through tears.

It struck me that we honor the dead for our own sake as much as theirs. We treasure the memory of them, our histories and experiences, to remember a part of ourselves. We perhaps hope that some day, others will think of us in the same way when we pass on to our next destination. That we won't be forgotten.  That maybe, in some form - may be it video, photo, object, or mitochondrial DNA, we will be a connection to both our past and the future.  I don't think it really matters whether you see the dead as familiar spirits that guide, angels up in heaven, a long line of mighty ancestors, off to reincarnation, or that there is no life beyond this one. What matters is that we acknowledge the power of death and the fast beautiful collection of moments that is life, and honor it.

The Gods Must Be Crazy

"The Horned One"
Art by Tempest

I feel like lately I've been seeing a lot of commentary about how the Gods aren't nice.  The basis of the discussion roots in the "realness" of the gods, and that they aren't all sugar and spice, made of just pretty statues and paper cutouts, waiting to grant our wishes and desires.

As someone who spent 10 years in Catholic School and whose mother taught religion while also having a Jewish father, my education included fairly intense theological discussions, and a keen interest in the Old Testament. Add to that a life-long passion for mythology from around the world - Egypt, Babylon, India, Native American, Greece, etc. So I can't help but think of both "my God is a vengeful god" and "and the Goddess/God was jealous of X, and cursed her to..." and go "No shit Sherlock, really? Who really thinks that?"

Whether you view myths of deities as a means to explain the mysteries of nature and human existence, or have a very real, personal relationship with a divine entity, it's very hard to deceive yourself  into ignoring the reality of how the world works.

Water gives life, but can flood and drown you.  Fire brings warmth, but can burn down homes and ravage the landscape. Earth brings us food, but can also yield poison and swallow us whole. Air gives us breath, but can also destroy and break us down.  Myths from every culture extol the virtues and blessings of the Gods, as well as their most foul attributes.  Which is no surprise when we look at the nature of humanity - our brightest and darkest moments, and everything in between.

If we are modeled in the form of the gods, why would they be different from us in virtue, vice, and personality?  If we all (gods and humans) come from starstuff, why would we not have other things in common?  Whether they exist because of us, we exist because of them, or something in between, we are undeniably linked.

I do understand the tendency for one breaking away from Judeo-Christian religion to want to embrace an opposite sort of deity - often one that is female, kind, accepting, and understanding.  But I think that is a fantasy that is short-lived as one grows to understand our relationship with nature, the divine, and ourselves. We know that a woman isn't just one thing, and that a mother goddess can be fierce and angry, just as a father god can be nurturing, protective, giving, and supportive.  One cannot be aware and not have an inkling of the balance.

As you journey along your path, if you happen to forge a personal relationship with a divine entity or spirit (or multiple ones), then you very quickly grow to understand the nature of it - the give and take of energy, the diversity of personality, the blessings and the curses. If we do come into it naively, the gods do not suffer fools well, and it's either sink or swim with the current.

So it makes me wonder, who are we really scolding about understanding the nature of gods? Or is it more about congratulating ourselves on figuring it out?

Either way, the gods are laughing.

A few words to listen to: